Salam. Is it permissible for me who is a female to hate women who has jealousy towards their husbands who married a 2nd, 3rd, and or 4th wife? I am not married, but I submit to Allah's rules and I do not see a problem if I had a husband who married others after or before me. I also know some Non-Muslim women who are married to the same husband and they have no jealousy. To them if one of them is spending time alone with the husband, they only feel left out of not having fun. For me, if I have a husband and I am his 1st, 2nd, 3rd, or 4th wife and he is spending his time on the other wife, I will not think that it is an issue. The only issue that I will have with my husband is if he is not giving my rights. Are most women nowadays have strong jealousy towards their husbands for marrying others before or after them?
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
The jealousy of a woman over her husband and her hatred that he marries other wives is a matter of her natural predisposition upon which Allah created her. Even the best women were not spared from this jealousy, such as the wives of the Prophet especially the mother of the believers, 'Aa'ishah .
The problem is not in her being jealous, but the problem is if this jealousy leads her to do what is contrary to the Sharee’ah, such as if she prevents her husband from marrying more than one wife, and so on.
You are not sinful for the fact that you hate the woman who is jealous, because hate is among the matters of the heart over which the person does not have any control. The person is responsible for the matters that he has chosen to do himself. Allah Says (what means): {And there is no blame upon you for that in which you have erred but [only for] what your hearts intended. And ever is Allah Forgiving and Merciful.} [Quran 33:5]
We ask Allah to make it easier for you to marry and grant you with a pious husband who will be a comfort to your eyes and from whom you will be blessed with righteous offspring.
Finally, it should be noted that it is Islamically permissible for a woman to look for a husband. So, you should seek the help of trustworthy relatives and female friends who may help you in this regard.
For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 82471 and 324487.
Allah knows best.
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