How to help a new convert to Islam
29-12-2009 | IslamWeb
Question:
I married a Christian woman from Moldavia, where I live, and Allaah the Almighty later guided her to Islam through me. How should I deal with her? How should she dress, given that her family does not know that she has become a Muslim?
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
Rejoice, for glad tidings await you! In a Hadeeth narrated on the authority of Abu Hurayrah 
the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, confirmed that any Muslim who guides others to goodness will have the same reward as those who follow him, without lessening their own rewards. [Ahmad and Muslim]
To invite people to Islam, a person has to follow the way of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, by applying the following:
1. Explain the principles of faith and the pillars of Islam in the same simple and clear manner that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, followed with the delegation of ‘Abd Al-Qays when they came to him. [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
2. Adopt a gradual approach in matters pertaining to what is permissible and what is not. Such a gradual approach is observed as a universal norm, as well as being an Islamic requirement that is stated in the Quran and the Sunnah. It actually helps in securing one’s position in Islam. Allaah the Almighty Says (what means): {And those who disbelieve say, "Why was the Quran not revealed to him all at once?" Thus [it is] that we may strengthen thereby your heart. And We have spaced it distinctly.} [Quran 25:32]
3. Demonstrate the meanings, morals and etiquettes of Islam in practice when dealing with your wife. It is reported on the authority of Anas that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, gave a Bedouin who came to him a generous gift. The man then went back to his tribe and invited them to Islam, saying that he was with a donor who gave with no fear of poverty. [Ahmad and Muslim]
4. Stress the element of Islamic faith that implies allegiance between Muslims and disassociation between Muslims and disbelievers (Al-Walaa’ wal-Baraa’). Also emphasize the importance of choosing righteous companions in protecting oneself from deviation.
As to her manner of dress in public, do your best to help her cover her body completely, even if she shows her face and hands at start. Later on, when faith is deeply rooted in her heart and she is better acquainted with Islamic rulings and manners, you can ask her to cover her face and hands as well.
There is nothing wrong in informing her family of her conversion to Islam. Please note that you should encourage her to be kind and dutiful to her family so that they sense the compassion and morals of the religion that their daughter adopted. This might be a cause for their conversion to Islam as well. However, if informing them will jeopardize your wife in terms of her religion, then you can conceal the matter until this fear no longer exists.
Allaah Knows best.