Brother refuses to divorce wife who criticizes Islam
20-4-2015 | IslamWeb
Question:
I have a very complicated situation so please forgive me if my question is slightly lengthy.Myself and my brother currently live in the UK. My brother married a woman who was a Muslimah but didn't seem very practicing at the time. She has since committed Riddah and openly speaks against aspects of the Deen. She has mocked our mother Aisha in my presence as well as mocked the Islamic way of life concerning Hijaab. She mocked the Islamic practices in KSA which she detests. All of these for me were unbearable and I advised my brother to tell his wife that she should either change or he will give her Talag. He has refused to divorce her claiming that he loves her and therefore cannot and that he fears divorce will have a negative impact on the lives of his children. I've given him Ayaat, Ahadith and scholarly opinions but he refuses to let this devil of a woman go. Many heated discussions have taken place between myself and my brother and I have told him that I do not wish to speak to a man who has no Gheera for his woman nor his deen so I will only speak to him when he changes his stance and gets rid of this woman. He continues in his refusal to do so and we have now not spoken for close to 2 years. My mother is saddened by the situation and wants me to reconnect with my brother. I understand my duty towards my mother and obey her but in this matter I find it hard to do so. I can not look at my brother nor speak to him when he lives a happy life with a Murtada knowing what he is doing is great evil. Am I being stubborn and am I in the wrong?
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ʻalayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
Firstly, we commend your zeal for the religion of Allaah and for its sanctity; this is an indication of your piousness and goodness. We implore Allaah to reward you generously for that. It should be noted that declaring a Muslim to be an apostate is a serious issue and should not be taken lightly; not everyone has the knowledge of the actions and words which take the Muslim out of the fold of Islam and which require declaring a Muslim to be an apostate. In fact, a Muslim may commit major sins and other misdeeds or even an act of disbelief that takes the doer out of the fold of Islam, but he is not to be declared a non-Muslim in the absence of one of the due conditions for Takfeer (declaring a Muslim group or individual as non-Muslim) or in the presence of an impediment to it. Please refer to Fatwa 8106.
Hence, we say that if your brother's wife has actually apostatized, then their marriage contract is void and she is no longer his lawful wife. Accordingly, it is impermissible for him to have conjugal relations with her; if he does, it is considered fornication. Please refer to Fatwa 134052 about apostasy and its effects on marriage.
You did well by offering sincere advice to your brother and his wife concerning this. We advise you to continue advising them. It is also better to seek the help of reliable scholars and virtuous people to whom they would most likely listen; hopefully, they will turn back to Allaah and repent from their sins.
It is prescribed for the Muslim to shun a persistent sinner; however, if shunning such a person will most likely not be of any avail, then it is advisable not to shun him but to try to win him over. Indeed, the matter revolves around the general good. Please refer to Fatwa 86090.
As for obedience to your mother, it is not unconditional or unrestricted. Children are obliged to obey their parents as long as there is a legitimate benefit in obedience to them and it does not incur considerable harm to them (children); please refer to Fatwa 84942.
Allaah Knows best.