If wife chooses divorce after husband puts the matter in her hands
19-6-2015 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalamu Alaikum,Sheikh during in verbal fight if husband says to his wife you want to live with me or your brother, choose one, and then he gives options to his wife that if you want to live with me then you have to choose one right now.Then, wife says that she swears to Allah that she wants to live with her brother, And ,at the moment, she really intended that and she wanted to leave her husband because she was really mad at her husband, but later neither her husband took her to her brother nor did wife left to her brother's house to live with him. I want to ask when husband gives options to his wife to choose between him or her brother, at the moment, then if wife said to her husband with the intention that she chooses her brother over her husband, what would be the ruling?Beside this incident they have 2 other divorces. Please clarify I am really concern and worried about it.Thank you for your help.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
Giving the choice does not by itself result in divorce, but it does result in divorce if the husband intends divorce by giving his wife the choice and she makes the choice with the intention of divorce, as Ash-Shaafi’i explicitly stated. Al-Majmoo‘ reads: “Ash-Shaafi'i said: "Giving the choice is an indirect (implicit) expression of divorce, so if the husband gives the choice to his wife whether to divorce or to stay with him in bond of marriage, and she chose to be free with the intention of divorce, then she is divorced. But if she says that she did not intend divorce by choosing to be free, then she is to be believed.”"
We would like to warn against divorce and using it as a way to solve problems. Divorce could lead to the breaking up of the family and the children could go neglected, especially if the wife has already had two divorces. If a third divorce takes place, a major irrevocable divorce takes effect, and the couple could regret this when it is too late.
Allaah Knows best.