Fornicating couple not obliged to marry each other
8-3-2016 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalaamu alaykum. I am a Muslim. I am in love with a girl who is a Sunni Muslim. My love for her is pure and I want to marry her. When I approached her mother, she denied me straight away, but when I again approached her, she agreed but said that we would have to wait one year. After a year, when I approached her, she said that her daughter did not want to marry me, which is absolutely false, as all this time she has been in touch with me in secret over the phone. I am very angry at her mother for her dual words. I pray daily and cry in each prayer for our marriage as the girl was pregnant by me twice. I cry daily for my mistake and seek forgiveness. I have explained every thing to her mother, but she still does not agree. I do not want to marry anyone else apart from her as I cannot forget her nor what I did with her in killing or aborting the pregnancy. I am in deep trouble. I pleaded with her mother to every extent possible and even begged her forgiveness for what I did with her daughter, but she still does not agree. I want to marry her so that at least I can repent by keeping her happy. I then approached a shaykh to help me to change her mother's mind to help me to marry her. Please, let me know. What shall I do to marry her? Please, help me.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
We hope that what happened to you with this girl would be a lesson for you and for all those who take sinful relationships lightly. We have already issued fatwa 81356 warning against this.
You must hasten to repent immediately, whether in regard to having this relationship or in regard to helping that girl in aborting and killing the fetus. Your repentance is not dependent on marrying her, and you are not Islamically obliged to marry her; rather, it is not permissible for you to marry her unless she sincerely repents. For information on the conditions of repentance, please refer to fatwa 86527.
If she sincerely repents to Allaah, then you may marry her, and supplicate Allaah as much as possible as this is one of the most important means for achieving what is required as Allaah is near and answers the supplications. Allaah says (what means): {And when My servants ask you [O Muhammad] concerning Me - indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided.} [Quran 2:186]
For more benefit, please refer to fatwa 188393.
If marriage is facilitated with her, then all is well; otherwise you should look for another woman to marry. As for love sickness, it can be treated; to know how, please refer to fatwa 84544.
You should not grieve for not marrying her but instead ask Allaah to facilitate for you someone better than her, as you do not know what is better. Allaah says (what means): {But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allaah knows, while you know not.} [Quran 2:216]
Finally, we advise you to refer to fataawa 85970 and 98739 on the rulings of abortion.
Allaah knows best.