Conditional Divorce
12-2-2018 | IslamWeb
Question:
Please give me detail and new answer for the sake of Allah as my whole life and well-being of me and my family is at stake. Please don't send previous links. Me and my husband had a case of conditional divorce which would be effective if I said a particular phrase. It would apply as many times as I said it. My husband does not have a infallible memory. Sometimes he says he meant saying that phrase only in that fight. Sometimes he says he meant all fights that may happen in future or just angrily. But he says he didn't mean in general situation. We went to a local scholar who acts in a panel of Muslim marriage issues. He explained to us both majority and minority views. He asked my husband what his true intention was. My husband said it was to prevent me from saying that, not divorce. The scholar said, "Ok. For you, I am going with the minority scholars this time only. So I am not counting this as a divorce. So you expiate for breaking your oath. But if you again come to me with such a conditional divorce case, I will not ask the intention and consider both divorces binding." After that I said that phrase in many contexts also including fight. But started having doubts. Can we rely on this scholar given the words he said? It seemed a bit unusual to me. My husband is very confident on him and doesn't consider it divorce after going to this scholar. So I am also afraid if I disobey my husband and leave him then I will be committing sin. Also he threatened me to go to court to take away our daughter. My question is, can we trust this scholar and consider no conditional divorce? The scholar is a qualified imam and member of Australian National Imam's Council and authorized for solving marital issues. Please give a detail answer that ends my doubts.May Allah reward you.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
The scholars differed in opinion concerning the ruling on conditional divorce, and the majority of the scholars are of the view that it takes place in any case. However, Ibn Taymiyyah 
is of the view that it does not take place if the husband only intended to threaten his wife and that he is only obliged to expiate for breaking an oath.
The Fatwa that the Shaykh issued to you is an opinion which is adopted by some scholars, so you can act according to it. The layman is obliged to ask a scholar whom he trusts and then act according to his Fatwa.
Al-Qurtubi said in his Tafseer:
“Regarding matters of the religion, it is an obligation upon a layman who does not have knowledge of and is unable to derive rulings from their principles (i.e., Religious texts) because he is not qualified to do so; it is an obligation upon him to ask the most knowledgeable person of his time in his country. After he issues a Fatwa for him, then he should act upon his Fatwa, as Allah says (what means): {So ask the people of the knowledge if you do not know.} He must endeavor to find the person whom the majority of the people consider as the most knowledgeable person.” [End of quote]
Therefore, you must ignore these doubts and have good marital relations with your husband. Both of you must endeavor to avoid things that lead to dissension, and your husband must be careful not to make divorce the way to solve problems, as this may lead to unpleasant consequences especially that Allah blessed you with children. In most cases divorce has a bad impact on children.
If your husband is in doubt whether or not he intended repetition, then in principle he did not intend it. So, the condition was invalidated when it happened the first time, and the arguments that happen in the future do not lead to anything.
Allah knows best.