A Third Divorce is Irrevocable
8-10-2018 | IslamWeb
Question:
I did not ask u talaq in anger. My query was that my husband said if u abuse my mother u r divorced. 4hours later I asked why u said condition about your mom? We had another argument. He abused me again. I abused him. He said if u abuse me u r divorced. I abused him and his mother. He said talaq occurred.After a month we went to a USA court for proof of talaq. Court was closed. I started my iddah. First when I asked he said he did not know his anger level; then 1 week later he heard me talk good about him. He said I heard u; I was angry and talaq in anger is invalid. I said no; u said the condition right away (He has habit of saying conditions on minor issues).After 5hrs he said did u abuse my mother due to anger or u abused her on purpose? I said I got angry. He said then talaq did not count cause when I said the condition I intended if u abuse my mother cause u get angry talaq will not count and if u abuse her on purpose to hurt me talaq will count. Then I asked him about the condition he said after 4 hours about abusing him. He said I said both conditions together. I said no. He said I do not recall if I said the condition again; I do not know if my intention was same as first 2 conditions OR I intended whether u abuse due to anger or on purpose talaq will count. Then he said I do not remember I said the condition after 4hrs but I am sure my intention was same as first 2 conditions like, if u abuse due to anger talaq will not count. Is his statement about his intention acceptable if he does not remember he said the condition again?I do not get his condition. Everybody gets angry if gets abused so what was the conditions for. He did not ask my intention for 1 month rather went court. I told my family I am divorced 3rd time.I cannot figure out my intentions if I did or did not abuse on purpose to hurt him cause he abuses me but he said conditional talaq about his mom? In the past I did not fill many conditions even I got angry but this time I did.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
It is clear to us that divorce has occurred, and your husband withdrawing his acknowledgement that divorce took place is not accepted.
If this is the third divorce, then you have become irrevocably divorced from your husband and he has no right to take you back unless you marry another husband –an actual marriage and not a marriage conducted only to make you lawful for your first husband again. The new husband must consummate the marriage with you, and if he divorces you or dies, then your first husband can marry you once your waiting period expires.
We advise you to take your case to the scholars in an Islamic Center in your country and act according to the Fatwa that they issue to you.
Allah knows best.