Doing What Benefits Parents and Refraining from Raising Voice Is Not Sufficient
12-3-2023 | IslamWeb
Question:
PLEASE DONT TELL ME TO SHORTEN MY QUESTION YOU ALWAYS DO THIS. What does it mean to be excellent to the parents. Like if we just do what benefits them and refrain from raising our voice to them is this enough. Like do we need to be extra kind and extra soft with them in order to avoid getting sin.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
The texts that indicate the command to do good to parents are absolute, Allah Says (what means): {…and to parents do good.} [Quran 2:83] In this sense, it includes conveying all good to them and preventing all evil from them, according to one’s ability. Thus, whatever the child can bring benefit to his parents, or ward off harm from them, he should do so.
In addition, whoever does what benefits them and does not raise his voice against them has done well, but their right is greater than that. Al-Bukhari narrated in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad that Sa'id ibn Abu Burda 
saw Ibn 'Umar 
and a Yemeni man going around the Ka‘bah in Tawaaf (circumambulation). The man was carrying his mother on his back, then asked ibn ‘Umar saying, 'O Ibn 'Umar ! Do you think that I have compensated her (by doing this) for what she did?’ Ibn ‘Umar replied ‘No, not even for one single pain of labor (childbirth).”
Moreover, kindness is obligatory, such as spending on them if they need it, and desirable, such as being amiable and affectionate to them and smiling when you see them, kissing their hands, talking to them with the most beloved words to them, and supplicating for them. Allah Says (what means): {And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, “My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small.”} [Quran17:24] Therefore, the fact that the child is softer and gentler with them is included in the desirable kindness and benevolence.
Furthermore, we draw your attention that disobedience to them occurs through doing any harm to them, even if it is little, such as frowning in their faces and showing boredom, as Allah Says: {Say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word.} [Quran17:23]
Allah knows best.