Unmarried Student in Russia (How to Be Patient)
8-7-2003 | IslamWeb
Question:
I have been living in Russia for six years. I am not married and to be patient in such society is so difficult, I have no girlfriends, although I cannot marry now because I am not ready for that (I have not finished my study yet and I will continue my education here for many years. What should I do? Advise me please and may Allah bless you with health and forgiveness.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
We advise you to fear Allah in public and privately. Indeed whoever fears Allah, Allah will dispel his worries and make him a way out from every hardship he encounters. Beware of Zina (fornication or adultery) and befriending ladies. In fact, Zina is an obnoxious sin that leads only to shame in this life and punishment in the Hereafter. Allah Says (what means): {And do not approach unlawful sexual intercourse. Indeed, it is ever an immorality and is evil as a way.} [Quran 17: 32]
Following are some instructions and guidelines which we hope will help you and be of benefit for you, Allah willing.
1. Use the Prophetic treatment to which the Prophet guided us when he said: "O young people! Whoever can marry should marry, as it helps one to lower their gaze, and guard their private parts, and whoever is not able to marry should fast, as this helps one protect his private parts (from committing illegal sexual intercourse)." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
2. Stay away from anything that could arouse your sexual desires such as watching films or looking at pictures of women or mixing with them unnecessarily. Anyone who keeps on being in contact of something will undoubtedly sooner or later indulge in it as it becomes so usual.
3. Remind yourself all the time of the bad consequences of forbidden desires and the harm that they could bring to you. Ibn Al-Qayyim 
said about this: “Refraining from the prohibited desire is easier than undergoing its consequences. The desire will either cause harm and punishment or prevent a more perfect desire, or waste time resulting in much grief and sorrow, or defile an honour whose preservation is better for the person than its discredit, or spoil some money which is better saved, or lower a state for someone who would have been better otherwise. Such temporary desire could cause the person to lose a grace which would have been more delightful and pleasant than fulfilling this desire. Such desire can also open way to some low people to embarrass you. It could also cause you much stress, sorrow, sadness and fear that could not be compared to the delectation of such desire. It could also cause you to forget some knowledge or to sadden a good person, or to have some enemies rejoice at your misfortune. Such a desire could cause some blessing to stop before reaching you or cause you a defect which lasts as long as you live. This is because deeds reflect on the characters and the manners.” [End of quote]
4. Fear Allah and know that He is aware of what you hide and what you do publicly. Allah Says (what means): {…but fear Me, if you are (true) believers.} [Quran 3:175]Ibn Al-Qayyim said: “Some scholars said: ‘The one who cuts one of your organs in this life just for 3 Dirhams, do not feel secure that the punishment He inflicts on you in the Hereafter will be similar to that.’ Some people said to Al-Hassan Al-Basri: “We notice that you weep a lot.” He replied: “I fear that He (Allah) throws me in Hell without minding.”
5. Keep on performing the prayers at their fixed times in the way Allah has prescribed and in congregation. Allah Says (what means): {…and establish prayer. Indeed, prayer prohibits immorality and wrongdoing, and the remembrance of Allah is greater.} [Quran 29: 45] Allah also Says (what means):{And establish prayer and give zakah and bow with those who bow [in worship and obedience].} [Quran 2: 43]
6. Keep on remembering Allah by mentioning Him as the person is strengthened by the remembrance of Allah and when he languishes in the remembrance, Satan gets hold of him. Allah Says (what means): {And whoever is blinded from remembrance of the Most Merciful - We appoint for him a devil, and he is to him a companion. And indeed, the devils avert them from the way [of guidance] while they think that they are [rightly] guided.} [Quran 43: 36-37]
7. Suplicate Allah as supplication is the effective weapon of the Muslim in protecting himself from doubts suspicions and all what he doesn't like. Allah Says (what means): {And your Lord says, "Call upon Me; I will respond to you." Indeed, those who disdain My worship will enter Hell [rendered] contemptible.} [Quran 40: 60]
8. Read the story of Yusuf 
the Prophet of Allah. Read it patiently as he is our perfect model. He did not accept falling into sin. He faced all temptations with resolution and succeeded. So, he became the example for all the people who came after him.
9. Be sincere, as lack of sincerity makes one fail in achieving triumph over the lurking enemy (Satan). Allah Says about Satan (what means): {[Iblees] said, "By your might, I will surely mislead them all. Except, among them, Your chosen servants."} [Quran 38: 82-83] See how Allah saved Prophet Yusuf from Zina because of his sincerity. Allah Says (what means): {And thus [it was] that We should avert from him evil and immorality. Indeed, he was of Our chosen servants.} [Quran 12: 24]
10. Lower your gaze as the Prophet said: “The glance is one of Satan's arrows which is venomous. So, anyone who avoids it for my fear, I will substitute it for him with a faith which he enjoys deep in his heart.” [Al-Tabarani]
11. Keep good company and beware of bad friends. In fact good company helps one triumph over his/her Satan because Satan is with the lonely and it stays further from the two (if they are good). Allah Says (what means): {And keep yourself patient [by being] with those who call upon their Lord in the morning and the evening, seeking His countenance. And let not your eyes pass beyond them, desiring adornments of the worldly life, and do not obey one whose heart We have made heedless of Our remembrance and who follows his desire and whose affair is ever [in] neglect.} [Quran 18: 28] However, bad friends are callers for desires and bad deeds. Allah Says (what means): {…but those who follow [their] passions want you to digress [into] a great deviation.} [Quran 4: 27]
We ask Allah to guide you to the Right Path and help you remember Him, venerate Him and worship Him in the way He likes.
Allah knows best.