His first wife and family will not accept polygyny
8-6-2004 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalamu Alaikum
I trust this email finds you in the best of Emaan and health. I am a married to 2 beautiful pious Muslimahs. I live in a Muslim country while my parents live in a Kuffar country. My parents have been against polygyny and since the marriage to my 2nd wife 3 years ago have hid this information from my relatives back in their country. Recently however one of them found out and I got my parents permission to inform my kinfolk of my marriage and the birth of my daughter. Another development has also been that my 1st wife is in Iddah because whilst she can find no fault with me she has been unable to accept polygyny and wishes to be separated.
Answer:
Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.
You have to know, dear brother, may Allah bless you, that being dutiful to one's parent is one of the most definite obligations. This obligation has been stressed by the Book of Allah, the Sunnah of His Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) and the consensus of the Muslim Ummah.
Marrying a second wife is not Wajib (obligatory) if one is content with his first wife.
Therefore, you have to put the obedience to your parents in priority and try to convince them with what you wish. If they agree then that's good, otherwise do not disobey them as long as it does not cause any forbidden matter.
Anyway, we advise the parents to fear Allah in dealing with their children and not to forbid them from doing what Allah, The Most High, has made permissible for them or ordained for them to do.
The parents should not exploit the obligation of the children to obey and be dutiful to them, as a way to oppress and constrain them. May Allah have mercy on the parent who helps his son or daughter to be dutiful to him (to his parents).